And it's back to work I go...

I'm ready for the most January of January's!

Photo by Nick Morrison on Unsplash

Standing at the train station on Tuesday morning, hair damp with drizzle due to my cheap umbrella losing the battle with the wind, I found myself surrounded by other fellow weary commuters, eyes not so much aglow in the post-festive slump. I thought to myself that this is likely to be the most January week I’ve ever had, because reader, after an 18 month hiatus, I’ve started back at work. On the one hand, I’ve blinked and here I am: back at it, back to responsibility and reality. On the other hand, I’ve led a whole other life for the past year and a half where so much has happened. How can those two thoughts, those two feelings, exist in parallel? How can I simultaneously think that so much time has passed yet it feel like no time has passed at all? Seriously, where does the time go? I used to think time only flashed by in an instant when you were working the 9-5, counting down the hours, minutes and seconds until the weekend. But it turns out that time also flies when you aren’t working and when you’re travelling or just kicking about a beautiful cottage in Ireland not really doing a great deal.

Anyway, I don’t have time to get into the philosophy of, well, time right now. So, yes, I’m back at work. I’m no longer Lyndsay-World-Wide-Traveller but Lyndsay-Project-Manager.2.0. Starting back at work after so long is nerve-wracking. Have you ever gone through something similar? I suppose it’s akin to returning after maternity leave or after any other sustained period of absence. I felt out of practise. How do you behave in an office again? What do you wear to an office? Even before travelling I mainly worked from home, my work attire consisting of comfy bottoms and a presentable-on-camera top. The outfit planning for this week has taken far too much of my headspace, let me tell you. I breath a sigh of relief at the prospect of being able to be back in the comfort of a home office next week. And, more importantly (just), how do you talk to people? After so long with it being just my husband and I, being around other people can feel unfamiliar at times.

I wasn’t entirely impressed when my last few days of “freedom” didn’t go to plan due to me being struck down with a head cold between Christmas and New Year. This then led me into an inevitable panic around how I would feel come the 2nd January. I haven’t been ill with a cold for so long but it’s something you seemingly can’t escape during an English winter. But, reader, you’ll be glad to know that I soldiered on with little fuss made, if you would believe such words. I then spent New Years Day eve eating Nando’s whilst watching Pretty Woman, an attempt at distracting myself from the myriad of thoughts jumping around my brain. When we left for our travels back in the summer of 2022, I didn't know how things were going to pan out. I don’t think I could’ve guessed what has happened since then even if I tried. I feel somewhere between going full circle and going in a completely different direction. My plan right now is to simply take one step at a time. Day by day. Moment by moment. Easing myself in to this new reality with kindness and courage.

My plan is also very much to carry on writing, and to steal a very apt phrase from the wonderful

Luisa Skinner

to write around the edges. My free time may be reducing but my desire to write is still strong and something I’m not willing to let go of. Next week marks a year since my first post on Substack (seriously, where does the time go!?) so watch out for my post celebrating such a special milestone. I then have 24 things to share with you which I’m bringing with me into 2024. I’ve had time to reflect on what has been a life-altering 2023, but now my focus is on the year ahead: shedding layers, re-building, re-focusing. In all honesty, the past two years have been unimaginably eventful and fulfilling and I sincerely hope that each upcoming year will hold the same, if not more. But, for now, I’m going to leave you with this quote I heard on a podcast recently and say to you all that I hope whatever you are doing, your January is full of everything you need it to be.

“Live your life by design, not be default.”

In other words, don’t live your life in a way that you think it should be lived and instead create the life you’ve always wanted to live. I think this is a powerful phrase, a reminder that we all have the power to design our own path in life and to not do something because that is what is expected or that’s how it’s normally done. So how are you going to “live your life by design” in 2024?